Color and Size

So, I also subscribe to Teen Vogue (I know, right? I'm totally crazy) and I got my November 2009 issue in the mail today. I am very happy with the cover. It's beautiful, stylish, wholesome. The red lips and sleek ponytails are in great taste.

Recently, I've noticed that I actually crave women of color on my magazine covers. I'm white, and I don't know if certain publishers think white women only want to see other white women on magazine covers, but that is not the case with me and with many other white women that I know. I love seeing black, Asian and Hispanic women on magazine covers. I'm glad Teen Vogue is acknowledging that non-white teens read their magazine, and that the powers that be have chosen to represent them. Enough with the insipid Lauren Conrads. I am, quite frankly, getting bored with seeing the same cookie-cutter and rather bland blue-eyed blondes staring blankly at me from the covers of pretty much every single major magazine. I'm willing to bet many others are bored as well.

Adult Vogue has been pretty good lately about featuring women of color on its covers what with Beyonce and Michelle Obama landing the coveted spot this past year. But they still have a long way to go. Most of the fashion editorials feature white models, and it's been a while since a black model has been on the adult Vogue cover.

Before I praise Teen Vogue too much though, I have to say that Chanel and Jourdan are a bit too skinny for my taste. I mean, they're really really ridiculously skinny. Just take a look at that first picture of them walking arm-in-arm. Their legs are basically stilts! Let's be honest, they do not look healthy. Although the color issue has not been completely resolved, I think a lot of attention needs to be paid to how skinny these models look.

Although, at this point it's like beating a dead horse. We can talk about it all day, but nothing is ever going to be done about it. Even with the recent deaths of two models from complications arising from eating disorders, the fashion industry barely batted a faux eyelash. Yes, I'm sure some of these girls are truly blessed and are naturally (and infuriatingly) skinny. But most of them? No way. Seriously, Chanel and Jourdan could both put on at least 20 pounds, easy, and still look great. Get on it, Vogue. I'm watching, and blogging.

Vogue Doesn't Care About Women

This is the conclusion I must come to after seeing a two-page ad for Davidoff cigarettes in the September 2009 issue of Vogue. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I thought cigarette ads were outlawed on billboards and in magazines. Has this rule changed? Maybe, but in any case, I think it's incredibly irresponsible of Vogue to feature cigarette ads and, thereby, to continue glamorizing this deplorable habit.

Vogue is always telling women how to look their best and feel their best and be their best. The importance of taking care of one's body, exercising to stay healthy, following the macrobiotic diet a la Vogue darlings Madonna and Gwyneth, and other such be-good-to-yourself is touted in every single tree-destroying issue to the point of redundancy. Over the years, I've seen numerous editorials about cancer research, articles written by cancer survivors, etc., and now seeing this ad is like a slap in the face, and just downright hypocritical. They do know that cigarettes cause cancer, right?

Smoking is not sexy or cool or fashionable. It's disgusting. It ceased to be "en vogue" years ago. Yes, many models, editors and designers smoke. Many of them also do hard drugs. It doesn't make it OK to feature ads glorifying the act. Vogue prides itself on having good taste in fashion, beauty and art among other things. Well, the decision to run this ad was in very poor taste.

I know that ad sales are a magazine's bread and butter, but I think Vogue should've passed on this one. I'm pretty sure they could've afforded to do so.

Vogue Hates Poor People

The much-lauded and massive (5 lbs; yes, I weighed it) September issue, in which Vogue gives us yet another yawn-worthy cover and over 300 pages of ads featuring overpriced crap no one in this economy (or in her right mind) can afford, landed with a thud on my doorstep yesterday. Once again we learn that Vogue is turning a blind-eye to the state of the economy right

now, although it's also doing a great job of pretending to care.

Case in point: Since this year's June issue, Vogue has included a regular feature called "100 Under $500" which, if you ask me, is a very sad joke funny only to the moneyed folk who appear in the magazine's society pages every month. The feature touts such "must-haves" as a hand-painted notecard set for $140 and a Louis Vuitton keychain for $250. Who the hell is going to spend that much money on a keychain and cards? These are things, I think we can all agree, that nobody actually needs. Randomly, a La Roux CD is thrown in for $24 - the cheapest thing on the list, and yet, still ridiculously overpriced for a CD.

Other items of note:

A fabric-covered caddy for $220 (and I have no idea what that is or what it's for)

A terracotta pot for $250 (seriously, it's just a pot)

A $495 scarf (which will be well over $500 after sales tax is calculated)

A $495 lipstick case (just a case, no lipstick)

Adding insult to the people battling foreclosure and debt, Vogue has the audacity to call these items, including a $450 pillow, "smart buys." Huh?

To be fair, I could never afford anything in Vogue, but I read the magazine because I love fashion and I enjoyed looking at the beautiful clothes, people and places. But in these economic times, the pages of the magazine have become a stinging slap in the face. How does that song go? "Money, money, money, must be funny in a rich man's world." Funny, indeed.

Christy Turlington in Vogue

Yay! Finally, a decent cover. My favorite model graces this month's (August 2009) cover of the magazine that is getting worse with every issue. Last month, it was Ms. It's Not Hard For Me To Fall In Love (coughwithmarriedmencough) Sienna Miller. A boring and horrible cover that I didn't even post. Hopefully, I'll remember to put it up tomorrow if anyone even cares.

This month Vogue presents its annual Age Issue, an attempt at pigeonholing women into their particular age category because we all know that that number is what defines us right? Right. Thanks Vogue. I am morphing into a confident, secure and intelligent woman with your ever helpful guidance.

Just like the Body Issue, the Age Issue is a disgrace. I mean, come on, do we really need to define women based on how old they are? Isn't it enough that Hollywood makes us all feel over the hill at thirty, anyway? Now the fashion magazines are joining the party, belittling women by making them feel too old and thereby irrelevant. And if you think this Age Issue is a celebration of women at any age, you're mistaken. As soon as the issue hits stands and mailboxes, women all over the country are frantically flipping to their age category, hoping a beautiful, young-looking woman was chosen to represent them. Then, they can feel "okay" about themselves. Sad.

Honestly, if I see another cover line that states "Fabulous at Forty" or something similar, I will stick my head in an oven. When did 40 become so old that we have to heap praise upon anyone who reaches that age and manages to look remotely human? I didn't realize that we were all supposed to drop dead at 39. Just stamp an expiration date on our foreheads and get it over with.

On a happy note, if you're over 35 and don't want to commit suicide, you've won. Congratulations.

Green, Literally.

The June 2009 issue of Vogue with a smiling and radiant Cameron Diaz on the cover leaves very little to the imagination. It has nothing to do with Cameron's clothing (she's bundled up in a white cotton shirt and pants by Stella McCartney), it has everything to do with the overwhelmingly green font color. You see, this is the GREEN issue in case you couldn't realize that just by looking at it. Btw, could there be anything more ironic than a Vogue Green issue? Especially, when the EIC and her minions have no qualms about wearing fur and flying in private jets. But I digress.

Anyway, about 60% of the cover lines are in a bright Kelly green font just to drive home how much Vogue cares about the environment because you would never guess that if you solely judged them on their actions.

Vogue Jumps on the India Bandwagon In an Attempt to Stay Relevant

In the May issue of Vogue, the editors once again prove that they don't have an ounce of originality left. Thanks to the success of Slumdog Millionaire, people are suddenly remembering that there's a country called India with a unique and rich culture (and aren't you surprised that greedy Hollywood and Madison Ave are all of a sudden so eager to capitalize on it?).

Not to be outdone, La Wintour and her army of Botoxed minions put together a fashion editorial complete with Indian model Lakshmi Menan, young Indian children dancing around in colorful costumes, and a title that reads "India Are We." Let me get this straight: Vogue is "India" now? Of course, it is; now that it's profitable and popular to be associated with anything remotely Indian - God, Vogue makes me sick.

I haven't read an article in Vogue in months because, quite frankly, they're completely irrelevant; but now even the pictures offend me.

Vogue's May 2009 Cover: Gorgeous!

I was happy as a clam to find the May issue of Vogue in my mailbox today. It seems Vogue has temporarily returned to its senses and finally put supermodels on the cover. This particular one features one of my all-time favorites: Liya Kebede.

Liya's one of those faces that is so preternaturally beautiful that you never tire of looking at it. I'm really glad she's on the front cover this time and not relegated to one of the other two pages of the fold-out. You may have noticed the phenomenon of putting black and other models of color inside the folded sheet so that their faces are essentially invisible on the newsstand.

To be fair the fold-out pages in this issue are beautiful, too. Moreover, the editorial articles inside feature a look into the lives of these great beauties, and I must say I'm truly grateful to La Wintour for sparing me yet another mundane celebrity interview.

Hooray for models, and keep 'em coming!

Unfortch, it's only a matter of time before Vogue goes back to sucking again...Let's give it about a month.